Techical Support staff should feel at home. It was reasoned that the Technical Support staff would be most productive if they were allowed to enjoy some of the ammenities that they enjoy while working on their computers at home. Therefore, beginning January 1, 1998: 1. All technical support staff will be allowed to sit at their workstations naked. However, employees will be held responsible for any skid marks left on their chairs. In light of this new policy, the old "pull my finger" trick will no longer be tolerated. 2. Staff will no longer be required to remove the following items from their workstation at the end of each shift: Pizza boxes Soda bottles Hostess snack wrappers Fast-food condiments AOL 1.44 Mb disks (reformatted) Printouts from alt.binaries.* Photocopied O'Reilly Nutshell Books Serial/Parallel adapters and IDE cables Passwords on Post-It pads Warez 3. E-mail bombs, ping floods and IRC wars will now be permitted. 4. Quake will now be served from the main Sparc machine instead of the 486DX-33. In order to do this, SMTP and POP3 will be replaced by UUCP (on the 486DX-33). 5. Smoking will once again be allowed in the equipment room. Non-Smokers will be encouraged to "act more like good team players." 6. Rimshots in the Men's Room will no longer be frowned upon by Management. Rimshots in the Ladies Room are still questionable. 7. Soft music in the background is OUT. Loud music in the foreground is IN. 8. Performance reviews will no longer address issues related to foul language, questionable moral conduct, or bathing habits. 9. New Hours Of Operation: 10 PM - 5 AM