Best of the Worst Country-Western Song Titles
     
 Do You Love As Good As You Look?
     
 Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor On The Bedpost 
 Overnight?
     
 Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life
     
 Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In The Bed
     
 Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye
     
 Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure
     
 Here's A Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares
     
 How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?
     
How Can You Believe Me When I Say I Love You When You Know 
I've Been A  Liar All My Life?
     
I Been Roped And Thrown By Jesus In The Holy Ghost Corral
     
I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life
     
I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling
     
I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me
     
I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart.
     
I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You
     
I Wanna Whip Your Cow
     
I Would Have Wrote You A Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yuck!
     
I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win
     
I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy
     
I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life
     
I'm The Only Hell Mama Ever Raised
     
I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart
     
I've Got The Hungries For Your Love And I'm Waiting In Your 
Welfare Line
     
If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You
     
If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low
     
If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I'd Blow It All On You
     
If The Phone Don't Ring, Baby, You'll Know It's Me
     
If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who 
Will
     
If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?
     
Mama Get The Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)

I remember this one, it's an old Bluegrass tune...^^^^^ (Kevin)

     
May The Bird Of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose
     
My Every Day Silver Is Plastic
     
My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love Jesus
     
My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John 
Was Breaking My Heart
     
My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him
     
Oh, I've Got Hair Oil On My Ears And My Glasses Are Slipping 
Down, But Baby I Can See Through You
     
Pardon Me, I've Got Someone To Kill
     
She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The Shaft
     
She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger
     
She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart
     
She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's Pretty
     
Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone
     
They May Put Me In Prison, But They Can't Stop My Face From 
Breakin' Out
     
Velcro Arms, Teflon Heart
     
When You Leave Walk Out Backwards, So I'll Think You're Walking 
In
     
You Can't Have Your Kate And Edith Too
     
You Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo Herd
     
You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat
     
You Were Only A Splinter As I Slid Down The Bannister Of Life
     
You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly